It would seem that the spirit of John Knox is alive and well in modern Scotland. Though in fairness to our arguably most famous hirsute killjoy, when he wrote his First Blast of the Trumpet Against the Monstrous Regiment  of Women he had not envisaged anything like Nicola Sturgeon.

I think if he had he might have reconsidered, after all the two of them have so much in common. I’m sure he may have warmed to her puritanical priggishness, her war against alcohol, her complete confidence in her own divine right to rule over and protect us from ourselves, her aversion to music and dancing( I’m no fan of the terpsichorean muse myself. I’d rather have my teeth pulled without anesthetic and I’m convinced it’s a feminist ploy to make men appear even more ridiculous and idiotic than we already are. As Cicero observed, “No one dances sober unless insane.” But I’m not against other people indulging. Have at it.) and her grinch like desire to ruin Christmas.

I have to be honest and say that despite the fact I’m fully aware of just how illiberal and despotic Wee Sister is, her war on students has left me scratching my baldy bonce in bewilderment. Among the student body are a great number of her most ardent supporters and disciples. She has invested much time, effort and public finance attracting them and keeping them on her side. “Free” tuition, the promise of “free” public transport and giving the vote to 16 year olds for instance. Why ruin all that bribe-ocracy by then turning University and college campuses into concentration lager? Admittedly sans gas, but give her time. Especially if they revolt.

( As an asides kids. Whenever you hear politicians blowing smoke up your backsides and telling you how mature and intelligent you are, there’s a quick and easy way to find out if they are serious or just full of wind and pish and trying to buy your votes. Ask them if they’ll allow you to smoke, get a mortgage, use drugs recreationally, have a few alcoholic beverages at your own wedding, or send consensual nude pictures of yourself via your phone without being criminalised or placed on a fiddlers register? If they start stammering, spluttering and backtracking like the miserable worms they are. You’ll know the answer.)

Maybe Humza Yousless should add students as a protected group to his pernicious Hate Crimes Bill. It would seem they need to be defended from Wee Sister’s spite. I say this because what other explanation is there for her cruel and unusual treatment of young people. The inhuman lockdown restrictions placed on students is nothing less than an unnecessary and idiotic violation of their individual or, if you are into that sort of thing, human rights.

Now I know some of you might be saying that it couldn’t be happening to a better bunch. After all most student halls are a viper’s nest of leftist agitators and, as I mentioned previously, a source of staunch support for the SNP and their Parks and Gardens Division The Green Party. But lets not forget that if you don’t believe in freedom for lefties you don’t believe in it at all, and I’m sure there are at least some students who don’t share those views and those who over the course of time might change their minds.

This is why I think Wee Sister has scored a spectacular own goal here. If it doesn’t make many students take a scunner to the SNP I believe it will put more than a few against her leadership. Division already runs deep within that sorry party and Nicola Sturgeon is nowhere near as popular as her own PR and the sycophantic pro Nat press would lead you to believe. Her handling of the Salmond affair was nothing short of duplicitous and scandalous. Her despotic dealings in draconian covid restrictions and in particular her callous treatment of the students might do for her. Hopefully.

There are many who continue to nonsensically claim that this is about public health and safety. (There really is no hope for you people at this stage. Stop chuntering on about “The Science” and start actually looking at it.) That she’s trying to protect Granny from the irresponsible hedonistic kids.(Notice Grandpa can go and eff himself, the patriarchal old git) But consider that she killed more Grannies with her irresponsible decision to turf them out of hospitals and into care homes than the kids ever could.

To the people who try to justify the oppressive imprisoning of young people in campuses instead of allowing them the freedom to live and enjoy their lives, I can only quote the words of Mr. Zacharias De La Rocha…

“Believin’ all the lies that they’re tellin ya. Buyin’ all the products that they’re sellin’ ya. They say jump and you say ‘How high?’ , yer brain dead, ye got a f**kin bullet in yer head.

Just victims of the in-house drive by. They say jump, you say ‘how high?”

It’s time to Rage Against The Machine.

Tam Laird is Leader of The Scottish Libertarian Party and thinks students shouldn’t be treated like prisoners.